Latest summer result: Wooden spoon (2023) • Best summer result: 3rd (2013)

After a refusal from the 'Great Overweight One' to extend the puny 600m course to a far more manly 3,000m, The Boy is feeling slightly hard done by. Only when a truly independent organiser takes over will this really be a fair competition. After intensive work on the golf course, the first event may just be his best this year.
Chances: Stronger than you think (although Nick isn't competing this year, is he?)
| Result | Score | Time | Seeding | Position | Points | Total | Overall | ||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Golf | 41 | - | 2nd | 8 | 8 | 2nd | |||||||
| Gym Tests | 76 | - | 7th | 2 | 10 | 5th | |||||||
| 100m | - | 5th | 4 | 14 | 5th | ||||||||
| Basketball | 0 baskets | - | =7th | 1.5 | 15.5 | 7th | |||||||
| 800m | - | 4th | 10 | 25.5 | 5th | ||||||||
| Football | 3 goals | 1m 33s | - | 8th | 1 | 26.5 | 6th | ||||||
| Darts | 9pts | - | 4th | 5 | 31.5 | 7th | |||||||
| Pool | W1 L6 | 4pts | - | 8th | 1 | 32.5 | 7th | ||||||