Latest summer result: Wooden spoon (2025) • Best summer result: 3rd (2022)

Our youngest competitor starts as second favourite in his third tournament and is edging annually closer to becoming the first Clifford engraved on the historic summer trophy. He could win the 100m running backwards, but cannot just rely on youth to win in the other events where guile, gamesmanship and good fortune come into play.
At the time of writing he is winning the unofficial best-facial hair event, but should any of the other competitors – this author excluded – forget to shave on Sunday morning his wispy manly tash might no longer be the biggest chick-magnet on show.
Joker: 100m